Reblog - Posted 1 hour ago - via / Source with 7,281 notes
Anonymous asked: Every human life is precious. Even a-holes not that you guys or anyone is- So the readers of this blog and the maintainers are all precious! You are all awesome. Have a nice day.

^^ thank you!

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Anonymous asked: Okay, well, Jen; is it okay if I decided that I only identify as a lesbian a few weeks ago(I've been thinking about it and guys don't.. I just don't like them at all anymore) but I have a boyfriend of three months?:

Hi love,

Yes, of course it’s okay if you decide that you identify as a lesbian! There is nothing wrong with that. However, you really need to tell your boyfriend about this. This isn’t something you can keep a secret from him. You have to have an honest discussion with him about how you feel, and evaluate whether or not you want to still be with him or not. If you do still want to be with him, then I would maybe reconsider your sexual identity. If you still have feelings for this guy, I don’t think you are a lesbian, but you probably fall under a different category. There are a bunch of different categories, and I think there is even one for people who prefer one gender but will sometimes fall for people other than that gender! Check out this page and this page on different types of sexual orientations.

Also, keep in mind that sexuality and romantic feelings are actually separate things. You can be sexually attracted to one group of people but not romantically attracted them, and vice versa. So when I say that I might be biromantic heterosexual, I’m saying that I have romantic feelings for both girls and guys, but only feel sexual attraction towards guys. Does that make sense?

But if you don’t want to label your sexuality, you don’t have to! Contrary to popular belief, sexuality and romantic feelings are actually a spectrum. You can’t always fit yourself into a specific category, and that’s completely okay! You can read more about that here.

Hope this helps,

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: You guys are so helpful and kind. Thanks for all you do! Take care of yourselves though too. Try not to get compassion fatigue! Have a wonderful day.

Thank you so much, this means a lot!

You are amazing!

- Spence

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Anonymous asked: Don't worry anon who did an extremely horrible thing. It's great that you feel bad that you did it, because that means you have a good heart. I think someone who doesn't feel bad about what they did might be, very rude or a jerk. However since you feel bad, it means you are a good person. People sometimes do really horrible things sometimes and that doesn't mean they defective. Of course they probably have to change their behavior but the action is horrible not you or not your whole being.

Thank you!

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Anonymous asked: The person who did a really horrible thing is not horrible as a person, the action is. You are still great and wonderful! I think the difference between shame and guilt, shame is feeling defective and guilt is to feel that one's actions are horrible. Your actions are horrible not your person. You can improve in the future and change your future actions. Antiheroes make mistakes and some are assholes, however they have good qualities, or redeeming qualities. You have redeeming qualities.

Thank you!

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leothedeadbunny asked: User v3ntbl0g has been making posts about being suicidal, and even though they appear to be okay for the time being, I am still concerned and would very much appreciate it if you could send them a message.
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Anonymous asked: aloneshecries-andaloneshedies this blog needs your help fast

Dear followers, please send love!

The link goes straight to the askbox, please like this post if you are messaging them.

- Spence

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Anonymous asked: (anxiety 13) Jen, I don't think u understand. If my parents find out... It's not even that bad. It's. It's nothing I swear. Everytime I say "im in a rough spot" it only gets worse. I cant do it. It's not that big of a deal.

Hi love,

I’m sorry that I might not understand. It’s hard for me to 100% fully understand because I’m not in your shoes, you know? But I’m trying my best!

What will happen if your parents find out?

If it’s not that big of a deal, it wouldn’t be affecting your life so much. Think about it this way: if one of your friends was going through the exact same thing you are, you’d tell them it was a big deal and they needed help, right?

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: I've done an unquestionably horrid thing and I deserve to die..

What horrid thing have you done, love? You can talk to us about it: we won’t judge you at all. I truly believe that, no matter what horrible thing you’ve done, that you still don’t deserve to die because of it. Unless it’s something really, really bad, I always think that a person deserves to live and try and make up for what they did.

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: I want to drop out of school, it's doing me no good, and it's just worsened my depression, I almost cut myself last night because of it, and I haven't had those thoughts in awhile, I really want out, but I'm scared of what my family would think me if I did.

Hi love,

What about school worsens your depression? Is it the workload? Your classmates? The teachers? What’s going on?

I’m sorry that you almost cut last night, but I’m proud of you for not actually doing it <3 That was very strong and brave of you, and you should be proud of yourself! Consider that a victory for yourself and a step towards major progress!

Can I ask how old you are? Depending on your age, there are other schooling options you can explore. Maybe we can help you figure out some of those options!

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: I'm really scared that I'm going to hurt myself badly tonight. I had the worst day today. this whole week went wrong. & Im trying to stay strong, but i know I'm weak. Help me

What’s wrong, love? What happened today? Why was it a bad day? Why was this week a bad week?

You are stronger than you think, love. You aren’t weak at all! You’ve stayed strong this entire week, so that shows just how strong you are :)

Try to remind yourself that hurting yourself won’t make things better. It will actually do the opposite and will just make you feel even worse. It might make you feel better for a few minutes, but then afterwards all your emotions will come rushing back. Then on top of that, you will be upset that you hurt yourself.

Can you call a friend and talk to them about how you are feeling? Maybe spend the night at a friends house so that you can keep yourself safe, because you are less likely to hurt yourself if people are around? What about having a friend sleep over your place?

Next, try utilizing distractions. We have distractions you can try here and here. Tell yourself that you will try ten things on that list before you will hurt yourself. Hopefully by the time you do those ten things, your urge will be gone or easier to ignore! I recommend keeping a list of distractions around that you can pull out whenever you are triggered. That way you can go through the list and check them off.

Lastly, try making a “reasons not to hurt yourself” list. This can help motivate you to not hurt yourself! I would make a list and keep it around so that you can pull it out when you are triggered to remind yourself why you shouldn’t give in to the urge. When you are triggered you aren’t thinking clearly, so it can be hard to remember why you shouldn’t hurt yourself. So having that list to remind you will help a lot! If you need some ideas for that list, let me know: I have a bunch!

Hope this helps,

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: crazy-minds-empty-hearts

Please send love!

http://crazy-minds-empty-hearts.tumblr.com/

Please like this post if you are messaging this person so we know who is being helped, and/or reblog to spread the word!

Reblog - Posted 1 hour ago with 2 notes
Anonymous asked: when will toki be on? is there still a message from -🍎 in the inbox?

I will let her know that you’re looking for her, and yes your message is in the inbox! Toki and Khia recently lost a pet, so they are going through a hard time right now, so that’s why they haven’t been on much.

<3 Jen

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Anonymous asked: Falling apart. Everything blurring together. Fighting with loved ones. Wanting to die. Too many emotions. Hurting so deeply. Taking pills sounds so easy. End it all tonight? -Jayyyy

Jay,

Please don’t take pills. I want you here. Fighting with loved ones doesn’t mean you aren’t loved or that you aren’t worthy of love. What are you fighting over? Is there any way I can help? 

Its okay to hurt you’re allowed to hurt but just because you hurt doesn’t mean you should swallow some pills. That is a permanent solution to something temporary. Death seems like comfort but love it isn’t, it really isn’t. There is a whole life time and a whole world for you and you shouldn’t just throw it away. There people who will love you and people you will love. Places you will visit. Music you will hear. Art you will see. Books you will read. Christmases and Halloweens and Spring flowers. Its okay to have emotions its part of life but honey PLEASE dont end it. Will you talk to me?

Love,

-Audrey

Reblog - Posted 2 hours ago